The Kaiser

Big problem with The Kaiser this morning. He invaded Poland again!
You see, we can't keep him in his fenced compound - he keeps digging under the mesh and bounding into the neighbour's garden. They have a sweet Pomeranian bitch in heat so I suppose the temptation is a bit too much for the old boy. Our neighbour, Thierry is perfectly OK about these amorous incursions but he happens to have as a new wife, a Polish emigré artist, one Helenka née Lebowska (kloszish) who takes a very dim view of it all. "Like the Wehrmacht just," she told Tish. "At night or at dawn, to rape and conquer."
Well, I ask you... Is that not OTT?

Tish suggested we might commission Helenka to paint a portrait of The Kaiser to mend our fences, so to speak, but I've seen some of her gallery work...
It's all squiggles!

I told Tish that it might be more seemly to invest in a course of anti-chaleur treatment for whoever needed it rather than hang the proverbial dog's dinner on the wall for the duration.
Sorted!